Our Obsessions

Some of the things we are obsessed with (besides alcohol and food of course):
-Pootie Tang: where our nick names come from, dirty dee doesnt speak english, bad bitty is really a black girl so it makes sense
-Bangs: lemme take you to the movies
-Patricia Lee/Mei Ling and Kim Shjarbeck/Ko0laidria: our other crazy friends
-Smang it: turquoise jeep!
-Hangover movie quotes: CLASSIC, pants at a time like this?
-"Just another day" : always applicable
-Shoes/Steve Madden: this man is a genius
-Love to take videos of ourselves doing completely absurd things (videos will most likely show up on our posts)
-Facebook: who isn't obsessed?

ACHIVES

I saved these text message convos that were between me and bad bitty...enjoy. and remember....none of the names have been changed...uh ohhhhh

*Background information: I (dirty dee) made out with this kid who looks like jafar/squidward at my sorority formal. (i took him because we were friends...shoulda known better) His name is Maurice who is 6'11'. A week before I made out with this guy shea who was unbelievable infatuated with me for some reason. The guy donald is someone who britt had sex with who is fat and is the only person she regrets having sex with. Bad bitty's house arrest fiance is the guy she has a crush on who has a daughter...and remember bad bitty lovesssss black guys.

April 27, 2011 12:21am

Me: (Katy perry voice) I kissed Jafar and I liiiked it….I feel like Shea won’t mind it

Me: p.s. I saw Donald at second storey and he said that he thinks you don’t like him anymore because you don’t text him anymore…I was like gooooood lol

Britt: LOLOLL manzi and moorice sittin in a tree…

Me: oh geez lol I’m such an artard
Britt: BINGOOO once again I come out the victor. Jk. I had sex with him so I lose. As usual. Bc I’m never the victor. Oh well! At least my godchild will be 6’11

Me: (katy perry voice) cus babyyy im an arrrtard…I hook up with giants and guys with boobs

Me: hahahahahhalololol I hate you yet youre so funny

Britt: I’m lolling like I think we’ve hit low points officially

Me:  its so pathetic that its fucking hilarious

Britt: Its one of the funniest stages of life…omg what is wrong with us?! This is nuts.

Me: (katy perry voice) Jersey girls we are an embarrassment..guido poofs and kissing squidward

Me: Idk why I am turning everything into a katy perry song

Me: Probably because my life is a joke much like her music

Britt: We can have a joint wedding. It will have to be at my fiance’s house (since he is on house arrest) but at least were both guaranteed a flower girl (his daughter)

Me: I am legit laughing my ass of lol hahahahahha

Me: and a ring bearer that little boy that’s always in Maurice’s pictures

Britt: Yup! His nephew...more than likely his son but he’s using nephew as a coverup bc our track records show we’re attracted to babydaddys

Me: hahaha this is truuuuuue…I can’t think of anymore Katy perry songs

Britt: You didn’t use teenage dream

Britt: Oh btw word has gotten around about me dancing the night away with the 12 foot tall Neanderthal basketball player. He’s very openly “feelin me.” Hahahahahha

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April 27, 2011 11:26pm

Me: Ok dats foine it’s a love song

Britt: I would expect nothing else since you said it was about us. Do you remember the tiiime when we fell in love (yes, 6^th grade lunch)

Me: hahahaha <3 our first date was Spanish class…blanca <3

Britt: Coincidence how my name was “white”

WELCOME

This page is all about the two most insanely stupid college students who just want to share their life with you all...why? Because our lives are so freakin ridiculous that it needs to be documented somewhere. So why not on a blog that no one but us will probably read anyway! In addition, we are not sparing any details on this site. We are not leaving out any details (it will get sexual) and we are not changing any names either. (risky we know) You will probably learn a lot about our personalities from our posts yet we will give you all a mini introduction. Oh and by the way our nick names come from the movie Pootie Tang...if you haven't seen it then you probably should...WADATAH.

Britt aka BAD BITTY: Attends university of Delaware. She basically drinks margaritas on a daily basis and falls for the worst guys possible. Her latest crush: a man covered in tattoos who is on house arrest and has a daughter. She has a delicious giant booty that most white girls wish they had. She also gets sick of things real easily and has the attention span of a 5 year old. (she is probably already sick of this site and she hasn't even written anything yet) She currently loves black guys and believes that her baby will be milk chocolate. While intoxicated she has broke her toe,chipped her teeth, chipped her toenail, taken a shower in her underwear, and cut up her ass while jumping a fence. Basically shit show #1.

Danielle aka DIRTY DEE  (sometimes called dirty dan): Attends Villanova University. She is probably more normal when she drinks. Her legs are all scarred up from playing soccer, falling in heels, and branding herself with a key. Everyone makes fun of her gross feet and are frequently referred to as her "bear claws." She also has delicious-looking boobies. She is horrible at comebacks and is only funny when she acts like a complete moron...which is all of the time. She also does not speak english and talks in her own weird language. Only people who spend enough time with her start to understand what she is really talking about. She does not really have a taste in guys but usually falls for the guys who play the "victim." Also many short guys are attracted to her due to her boobies being eye-level. She also is addicted to food and looks forward to the next time she gets to eat again. Basically shit show #2.